Wednesday, November 16, 2016

MaNaYa

My friend just last night shared her experience invoking Hecate and "shedding her skin". Today I was transferring some files and came across a trance-writing from an experience I had invoking dark mothers, Kali Ma, Inanna, and Baba Yaga. I've kept this private for almost a year now (12/26/15) but the synchronicity has encouraged me to share. What she shared was even more intimate.

Thinking of skin against skin I cant breathe again is there even a me or am I just a mirror with delusions of individuality the dark mother calls me and I can't even answer because I am empty fill me ma fill me na fill me ya I have no one else to be manaya will be my name and I will build myself from pain. I am a shadow a shadow a shadow empty insubstantial and nonselfforming help me darkness embrace me so I can be a self ma na ya ma na ya ma na ya dark ladies let me share your death bleach my bones and make me ma na ya even this prayer an echo of the face that shattered the mirror I am an emanation of an emanation and there is no truth in me bleach these bones kill the lie everything I never was must die only in nothing did I ever find me but nothings just another shadow. Can I be anything but a shadow? I want to be I want to exude from within I want to be free from the emanation from the reflection I want to be more than a reaction. Ma na ya kill me so I can exist its the only way I know to truly be.